Speed up #avantgarde #film

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Feeling emotional today...

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Short story: Judgement

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Please ignore my bad writing. It's two in the morning and I cannot sleep. I just have something in my mind that I need to let out because I just cannot seem to forget it. I don't think you guys would believe me when I say this but I just experienced something awful or should I say more clearly as something out of this world. Well, it happened just a few hours ago when I was at the library. You see I have a writing session at the library once a month, usually on a Sunday, and I often go there simply for therapeutic reasons. I must say that my childhood wasn't really the best and I have nightmares about it often. Just this morning, I had a nightmare and I was punching the side of my wardrobe while I was in bed because in the dream, I was punching the idiotic school bully that used to hunt me. As I grew older, I become a paranoid loser. I am fearful of a lot of things and I just ended up living my life in constant fear and so I often don't have friends. I thought that this...
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A coffee cup

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Bossa nova in the background, playing softly but it was playing loudly earlier. I sat down here once again like I did last month and I am looking at the cup of coffee that is not mine. I don't care. I don't want a cup of coffee and I, in fact, skipped breakfast this morning just like yesterday because I am not hungry for some reason. I don't know why I come to this writing space that's provided by the library because I feel that I am not actually writing at all but rather just writing down on my blog because I am not in any mood to write to begin with. I just attended today to see how I can proceed with the facilitation of the event because I signed up to be part of this event. Well, that was last year but I will not be surprised that last year will be repeated again this year. I won't be surprised at all. I have a book with me and I am going to read it soon because I am very bored. I guess I am bored with this concept. I just agreed to help but maybe it can help ca...
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Time wasted

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 At the end of the year now, I feel that I did not accomplish much, and even for the last two years of my life, because I've tried to do a lot like finding a job or promoting my art but it all seems to not have materialised well for me since the progress led to nothing and the achievement that I wish for has not been gained. I have tried a lot of things. I have tried. I feel tired, and right now, at the end of the year, I'm feeling sick as well because I have this infection and flu that occurred throughout the week. Maybe I am just unlucky, and maybe I am not doing it the right way, although the ways that I have chosen are the tried and tested ways of doing things. Ultimately, I feel like a loser. I feel like someone who has not been successful, and I guess I should look forward to next year with the same outcome, because if I do try to push myself up into progress, there will either be someone or some external circumstances that will prevent me from achieving what I want to ac...
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